Snowboarding in Ohio? Aw, c’mon. And Best on the Planet? Puh-leeze.
Give us a chance here. On one hand, you may perceive Best on the Planet as somewhere in Canada or Switzerland or France. But if you are not there at the particular moment, Best on the Planet doesn’t do much good. Really, ultimately, and yes, selfishly, Best on the Planet should be wherever YOU happen to be on any given day. It’s a state of mind.
Besides, the State of Ohio seems to decide most of our U.S. presidential elections, and therefore proper respect is due …
Ohio’s Alpine Valley, near Akron, tries so hard, advertising itself like this: “The 9 slopes at this ski hill are brilliant. The ski resort gets blanketed by so much beautiful snow, 10 feet per year, and that is an incredibly splendid coverage.”
Then comes an admission: “A 230-foot vertical drop is, of course, not that much, but Alpine Valley makes up for it with other things … Good exercise and just hanging out with our skiing palls surpasses anything.”
They have a point. To go a step farther , let’s say you are a really fly snowboarder and you come upon a place like Ohio’s Alpine Valley. There are hundreds of Alpine Valleys across the country, of course. So are you too good for Alpine Valley? Baseball and football and basketball players, even golfers and tennis stars, play at clinics in disadvantages places. Why not you?
Alpine Valley does indeed have Xtreme areas and a permanent half-pipe with rails. Stop by, show off some of your best tricks, and then greet the locals as they come a-runnin’. Offer a few pointers. You’ll feel good about yourself.
Ohio offers more than just Alpine Valley.
There’s the Big Creek Ski Area (they have snowboarding too), a half hour from Cleveland, in which the members actually own their own mountain, buy their own snowmaking equipment and so forth. This may sound more like Russia than Ohio, but it’s true, fellow traveler.
At Boston Mills Brandywine they’re getting ready for the snowboard and ski season already, prepping for the 2nd Annual OktoberSTEEZ Rail Jam, followed by a Level One Productions video premier on the Big Screen Outside.
Then there’s Mad River Mountain. Can you imagine a greater name for a snowboarding place? Alas, Wikipedia reports that “because the natural snowfall averages only 36 inches, snow is not always naturally available.”
Scoff all of you Best on the Planet snowboarders, but ask yourself this: If Mad River Mountain were the only place remaining on earth to ride your board, wouldn’t you go there?