By Alfred L. (COO/CFO), reporting live from ground zero of no-internet anarchy at Zappos.com Headquarters.
We had a little Internet outage today at the Zappos offices for a couple of hours. I was told that some router’s firmware puked, whatever that means. There was a time when we were able to put in a full day’s work just fine without this thing called the Internet. Those days are officially over — at least at Zappos. Since we couldn’t access our news feeds, personal emails, and internet radio stations…I mean, our corporate emails, servers, and systems, we thought we would have a little fun in the process.
Our Finance team had been planning for a while to have a 10-key Olympics. For those who don’t know, we wanted to know who is most proficient at using only their right hand to enter data with the numerical keypad. Pretty geeky stuff, but they had a blast because they are geeks. Given this world of edi, xml, and all sorts of electronic data transfer formats, we seem to still manually enter a ton of data. i guess every now and then smart technology just isn’t so smart?
Speaking of smart technology, our development team had been slowly amassing an arsenal of low-tech Nerf weapons of mass destruction over the last few months. it began with small revolver guns with 6 Nerf pellets, but it had escalated to motorized guns with modified banks of Nerf pellets and rubber bands to make the pellets fly further. Since the Development team couldn’t connect to their precious code and whatever backdoor games they’d put on our servers, they entertained themselves by shooting anyone who walked by their desks.
As with the rise of any oppressive power, a revolution began, and developed (no pun intended)into a full scare Nerf war. Our finance team invaded their area and just started shooting. I held the door open to the development lair and have scars on my back from all the pellets fired upon me.
Our developers retaliated in full force, pushed the finance team back, disrupted a peaceful gathering of 10-key olympians, and kidnapped a few hostages. An armistice was called when the war started to intrude upon conference rooms where real meetings were being had — must be those low-tech merchants who don’t need the Internet to have a productive meeting.
Others took a more solitary approach to Internet withdrawal.
Keith C. decided to use the time trying to beat his own top score on Bulls-Eye ball 2.
Johnny p. decided to catch up on some much needed shuteye. How does he sleep with the noise of Bulls-Eye Ball 2 in the background and the cries and carnage of his team members in the development lair?
oh, Internet is back up…back to work…got to make up for 2 hours of downtime!
P.S. If you like to work hard and play hard, send us a note and your resume to email@example.com.
P.P.S. To our investors, your blood might be boiling about the thought of our internet being down, but i assure you that our website was up and running during this outage and still taking orders from customers. ;-)